By Lucy Neville Wellness 13.09.2025

“I’ve Had Anxiety For 15 Years – This Realisation Changed Everything"

After a year of candid conversations, podcaster Lucy Neville discovered something that shifted her approach to mental health forever.

I’m on the couch watching Love Island with my partner, Jon. Except I’m not really here. My mind is anywhere but. First, it’s in a flashback to 2016, replaying an argument with a friend that I’m not particularly proud of. I think of the most perfect comeback, only it’s nearly 10 years later and she’s almost certainly forgotten that I exist. Never mind.

Next, we revisit my interaction with a barista this morning, and I’m questioning whether my tone was friendly enough when I said “Decaf soy latte, please.” My stomach drops at the thought that there are people out there who don’t like me, and my hands get all clammy as I recall all the emails I wish I could unsend. All of that before taking a quick scroll through the to-do list that has a permanent residency in my brain:

Organise perpetually unorganised wardrobe
Buy fibre supplement for dog
Book travel vaccination appointment
Get new script for antidepressants
Write list of everyone I can think of who might hate me

I bring myself back to the living room where the Love Islanders are recoupling on the telly. Good for them. I look over at Jon and he’s present. He’s locked in. His brain seems smooth, while mine feels static. Jon doesn’t live with anxiety. He experiences the acceptable level of stress about work like most of us do, but he can switch off.

When I ask him what he’s thinking about, he says “Nothing”.

Nothing.

Can you imagine?

I can’t recall the last time I thought of nothing. I come face to face with this reality during Savasana at the end of a sweaty yoga class. Flat on the mat, unsuccessfully encouraging my mind to empty itself.

I FaceTime Kee on the way home.

Kee and I bonded over a willingness to share our struggles with our mental health, and our friendship became somewhat of a lifeline to us both. Because there’s a particular grief that can accompany mental illness, a deep loneliness, and having someone to voice your (often) embarrassing and (sometimes) nonsensical thoughts to is a true gift. A gift we wanted to share.

We started our podcast, I’m Wigging Out, with the intention to lighten the load of fellow overthinkers and deep feelers. Because while our bond is unique, our problems are universal, and we saw an opportunity for a show that tackles mental health in an approachable way. With humour and compassion.

Our episodes centre around an anonymous listener dilemma to which we give our well-intentioned, albeit entirely unqualified advice. Career, love, friendship, mental health – no matter the dilemma, our goal is to leave our Anon feeling like they’ve been wrapped up in a warm hug, snapped out of a spiral, hoisted out of a tornado.

I could never have anticipated that these anonymous dilemmas would do the same for me.

After co-hosting our mental health podcast for more than a year now, I’ve learned that when we share vulnerably, we carve out little pockets of self-acceptance in each other. And each week, when Kee and I sit down to read through the dilemmas that have come in, I often find myself reflected in the submissions.

‘Be vulnerable’ feels like an overused piece of advice that you might find on bumper stickers or bathroom mirror decals, but the ripple effect of true vulnerability can be life-changing. We receive countless messages from our audience telling us so – that listening to our experiences with mental health shed light on their own.

I know exactly how they feel, because I was diagnosed with OCD a few years ago after listening to an episode of But Are You Happy? where Luke McGregor spoke so candidly to Clare Stephens about his experience with OCD. Listening to someone describe what I’d been living with in secret was like a clearing of the clouds. I know now that my form of OCD is relatively uncommon, and it’s possible that without Luke’s vulnerability I would never have come to a diagnosis.

I’m not saying you too need to start a mental health podcast in the name of being vulnerable. It can be small daily acts that can make way for meaningful conversations with the people we love, like answering honestly when someone asks “How are you?”.

Because sometimes all it takes is seeing a little piece of ourselves, mirrored back in the experience of someone else, to remind us that we are absolutely not alone. As much as we like to think we’re special (and we are), none of our experiences are unique. Sometimes, they’re just unspoken.

This article is intended for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for individualised health advice. If you are concerned about your health and well-being, please speak to your doctor, who will advise on the correct treatment plan. You can also call Mind's support line on 0300 102 1234 and find more resources here.